Flopped Broadway in a MTT @ FCP in late position w/JT, checked to me, I bet, called by both blinds, turn 6, making a flush draw for the river, checked to me again, I bet again, SB re-raises all-in, I fold. I FOLD?!? WTF?!? The drawbacks of online poker. I was steamed because it's happened a few other times since I've been back, in big pots at important times. But Bob is the best, and that's why I love FCP-he credited me $40 in real money and $50 in bonus. That's the kind of personalized care from FCP that I bragged about in Vegas-any other site would simply say, "Sorry." Thanks Bob and thanks FCP.

The 2006 WSOP Main Event began today. Over 8,000 players. and Norm MacDonald was chip leader for a brief moment. Joe Sebok dressed as Robin due to a losing bet. Jennicide is out on Queens, after a late start. Action Dan got busted by Mike Sexton's re-draw. 88 vs 55, flop 55, 88 catches perfect cards to river a straight flush-OMFG. Clonie Gowen out. Tobey Maguire is out already, as is James Garner. The first player to bust was 7 minutes. How the fuck do you blow through 10,000 chips in 7 goddamn minutes?!? And how lame is this new "all-in" button?

Watched Sarah Silverman's "Jesus Is Magic." If she isn't the most outrageous, irreverent, cutest little thing in the whole wide world, I don't know what is. Please marry me so I can tell my Grandma I met a nice Jewish girl. Totally offensive but absofuckinglutely hysterical.

Eeek!

OK, after watching Daniel's video blog, and hearing how he spent $49K in a $1000 re-buy event and a mil in the Big Game over 21 hours, I don't feel so bad.

English midterm was open book, open notebook. That's good news.

Boston @ the Coliseum. Big Hurt drilled a couple. A's win. Manny Ramirez is a douchebag. I got reprimanded by the father of a kid wearing a Red Sox hat and jersey who kept walking by and I kept hassling. Not like I singled him out or anything, any Sox fan in my general vicinity was fair game. He just kept walking by. I didn't know he was 13. So I'm an asshole; that's nothing ground-breaking. OK, my bad.

More LV

Sunday 1AM: Back to Binion's for a private FCP "Army" game, 3 tables for us; the staff of Binion's really went out of their way to accomodate us. 1 big table of $2/4 HE, 2 smaller $2/4 mixed game tables. Somehow shots of Jack Daniels start coming around, and quite frequently as well (I guess me asking for them every 4 minutes might have had something to do with it also). The two hands I remember were turning a boat and a friend picking up a straight flush on the river to scoop the pot, then right after that he turned quads (another friend would have made the boss full w/KK, luckily he abandoned ship beforehand). We had a super-fun table-those who were there, I had a blast. I went down, came back up, went down again, then got some back from this wanna-be thug from Jersey that sat in with us later, drunk as hell also. I don't remember exactly 'cause I was drunk, but verbal conflict began between the two of us, he wanted to arm-wrestle, then go outside and fight, of course I wasn't being helpful I'm sure since I'm a natural smart-ass but eventually we got back to business playing some short-handed $1/1 NL HE and his chips started sliding my way. Now one big reason why I don't drink alcohol anymore that much these days is because I get stupid and boisterous as you all know. And I love to scrap. This situation could have escalated but at least I have the sense not to start a fight in a casino-that's just pure stupidity. I'd rather fleece him on the felt which is what I started doing until he once again wanted to get physical. Michael had sat down with us, he started in on him, and at one point they both stood up, and my chair flew backwards instantly, and they broke the game. Binion's was totally cool with our crew; they didn't realize numb-nuts wasn't with us, and like I said, they were great about it all. So we headed over to a craps table, which was ice-cold, them moved to a blackjack table. Five of us proceeded to have a blast until I decided 8:30AM was my cut-off point; I was faded.

2PM: Last day in town. Head down to the Strip to meet up with some friends who are doing the whole "tourist" thing. Start off at the Monte Carlo, then over to Coke World and M&M World. MGM and the lions. New York New York for a winning blackjack sesh. Bellagio for the fountain show (a guy trying to take a photo of his fam falls into the bushes backing up for the shot!)and check out where "The Big Game" goes down-Deeb is eating in there, see Chau Giang as well, and apparently/unfortunately I missed Gus. In-N-Out for those who haven't yet had the pleasure, Animal Style all the way. Back downtown, sign up for the 2AM NL HE tourney @ Binion's...

Part Three-2006 WSOP Event 31 $2K NL HE

Friday 8AM: Wake-up call, shower and shave (hah). Decided to rent a car because, personally, $60 for 2 cab rides so far blows ass. Breakfast at the Rio then head down to the Convention Center to register early for the tournament and beat the lines. Nervous but excited; this is my first major after all. Find out Robin placed 30th and made a little extra dough, Sol made it into the top 100 as well. Action Dan is in the house as are even more pros that I didn’t see the day before.

12N: Cards are in the air. Start off with $2K in chips, blinds are $25/25, 1 hour levels. There is one pro at my table, the young Asian guy who was on FSN’s Superstars II, can’t remember his name for the life of me though. 2nd hand in I look down at AK in the BB. Flat-call after the pro raises it up from middle position. Miss and fold when he bets on the flop. AJs a bit later I elect to raise a bit from UTG. Pro re-raises me, I decide to gamble a little, especially since he pushed me out of that last pot. Jack high flop, I check, he bets, I call, turn is a blank, I check again, he checks as well. At this point I should have put out a value bet on the river because my Jack is probably way good. But I don’t, I check, and so does he, and my hand is good. Another player’s 44 flops quads in the BB, UTG had QQ and didn’t once raise to try to protect his hand, the lock puts a little bet on the river is how we find all this out. My folds becomes monsters; J7s flops flush, K2 turns boat. The pro gets eliminated from our table as the remainder of his stack disappears into another player’s.

Table change. 99 flops overs and I drop it. Limp w/66 in early position, raised behind me, 1 caller, I call as well. Flop A6x, I check, raiser bets, caller behind again, I push all-in. First AQ folds after deliberation, 2nd AQs calls. Turns the flush draw but bricks on the river and I gain a big piece of ground (the guy who called me someone said he was on TV before and I vaguely remember him but a name is way out of the question). A3 on the button, I limp to see a cheap flop with position on the one other limper who called before me, flop AAx, BB checks, early shoots, I call, 6 turn, shoots again, I call, blank on river, check, check, turns over 66 for a boat. I got off cheap on that one, it could have been real expensive for me but then again I probably could/should have pushed him out by raising the flop.

Table change again. Get moved to Kathy Liebert’s table, she is 3 seats to my left. First thing she says after looking at my stack is that she can double through me, to which I reply that she’s welcome to try. She’s actually a lot of fun today. The guy behind me has a banana and offers it to Kathy (doesn't anybody else find that thoroughly amusing?). 88 I raise in early position, Banana re-raises behind me, I fold after thought (he tells me a little later he had TT). 88 again a bit later, I limp, Banana again raises me again but another player behind moves over the top for an easy fold for me. I look down at AA and raise it to no action. Short-stack moves all-in, folded to me in the BB w/AK-I call and lose to a 62 when a 6 hits the table.

Moved again, this time to table 66, seat 6. Another AJs that misses the flop.

Table change yet again. Brett “Gank” Jungblut is 2 to my left, John Bonetti and David Williams behind us. Gank is hassling Bonetti and Williams is chiming in. A KQ of spades takes down a big one, as I am UTG and take a flop with 2 players behind me, flop Txx, 2 spades. I check, 2nd to act bets, and I have already decided to check-raise all-in, so after 2nd moves, I start to push, saying "all-in" but the other player in the hand before hadn't folded, which I thought he did, and he was also about to do the same thing with a smaller stack but then he saw me start action and froze. A floorman is called over and tells the player that he must at least make the min raise as he was caught in a foreward motion with his chips. So he does, asking me if I got a set and I am now all-in over the top of both with a shrug. Both fold, original raiser said AT, the guy who was going to go all-in said QT and I take a nice pot. Gank gets called on a move pre-flop and busts out. An AQs gets nada so I toss it.

The final #s for the event are: 2050 players, $3.7 million prize pool. I am not sure of my exact exit # but it was around 425, putting me in the top 25% of the field roughly. So to those who staked me, sorry I couldn't flip your money for you, and thanks for letting me try. I'm going back next year, and dammit, I'm gonna make the money.

8:30 PM: After coming back from the dinner break the antes were up to 50 and the blinds were 200/400, making my M a nip over 4 (I will go a little more into detail later about my last 10 hands). Suited 9T in the cut-off, folded around to me, I’m hoping to either take down a pot that will increase my stack by 1/5 without any confrontation, or if I get a call, at least I should have live cards. And that’s only if the button, the SB, or the BB wake up to a monster as it’s still a pretty solid raise. BB finds AK and calls from a big stack, K hits the board and it’s all over. All in all, I had a great time, it was a helluva experience-in fact I think this just became an annual outing for me. I outlasted many pros-Cloutier, Arieh, Chip Jett, “The Mouth,” Hellmuth, Huck Seed, Gavin Smith, “Bear,” Jennifer Harman (she is so cute!), “Fossilman,” Kenna James, and Kathy. (Post-note: Mike Caro and Jen Tilly made the top 200 in the money, Action Dan got as far as 23, and Justin Scott was the 1st place finisher, taking home $842,262)

9:30 PM: Voodoo Lounge, top of the Rio. Some friends are at the door when I get over to that side of the resort; apparently the bouncer won't let one in with jean shorts. I argue, the bouncer is a dick, a few minutes later we watch him let in someone else with the same attire, so I call him out, he finally gives up and lets us past. Without paying the $20 cover charge-so screw you bub. The hottest elevator ride ever takes us to the top of the Rio, where the FCP Army has gathered in full force. I actually have a couple beers to settle my system after blowing out of the tourney an hour prior. The view from the balcony of the entire area is pretty sweet. Daniel shows up and hangs for a while, as does an inflatable sheep. Much revelry ensues. I leave early, as my mind is still going over my play somewhat, and I'm not a big bar/club kind of guy anymore really anyways as most of y'all know. As I get all the way almost to the parking lot, I realize I left my credit card without closing my tab. As I am walking back I see Harry Demetriou, who tells me unfortunately he won't be attending the festivities at the Voodoo Lounge with us, as John Gale just won the PL HE bracelet and they're on their way out to celebrate. So all the way back to the lounge, and as I'm re-entering, DN is on his way out and I pass on the news of Gale's win. And as I'm once again on my way down and out to my car, Fidler is at the door, trying to get in and I tell him that Daniel had left already and he decides to pass on the 40-deep line waiting to enter. While I'm searching for where the car is parked, I come across a couple of young women with a rent-a-cop trying to use a wire hanger to unlock their door. I offer my assistance and after numerous tries am able to free the lock for the girls. My instant karma unfortunately isn't some hot 2-on-1 action but rather that my car is only 2 cars away from theirs. Oh well, a guy can hope, right? Drive back to Binion's and opt to blow some steam on the craps table, as well as a bunch of money. Finally hit the hay between 6 and 7AM, with the intention of playing the Caesar's daily NL tourney at noon...

Saturday 11AM: Wake-up call for the tourney, I am still in bed, enjoying my slumber, so I pass. Two minutes later, I am up and running down the hall to see if I can catch my party before the elevator. Nope. I hurriedly throw on some clothes and run downstairs to see if I can catch 'em at the front desk. Nope. I run into the parking garage and the car is still there. They show up moments later and we all head to the Strip. Some others are there already and we sign-up for the NL tourney. $130 total buy-in, which includes the re-buy/add-on. A pretty good tournament structure all in all, I don't make it exceptionally far, but one of us goes pretty deep but unfortunately runs into an AA in the BB w/his AQs UTG. Learn the basics of Badugi, which is Triple Draw with 4 cards and different suits. Back to Binion's before the big FCP Army dinner at Cafe Ba-Ba-Reeba with Patty, Daniel's assistant and FCP Forum mod. I found the service and food to both be very good. The young pro who busted off my first table the other day is also at the restaurant while we were-still can't remember his name.

Back Home

Back on FCP last night, getting royally fuct. Enter the Oil and get a great stack w/AA v AK right off the bat and pump it up to over 7K then flop top pair w/top kicker as well as the nut flush draw but the wrap draw spikes a higher pair on the turn and my draw bricks. Get into a big pot and get folded due to a lag in the software. One more hand to play and I'm out just like that. Get no love in a ring game either, as I river 2nd nut straight, nut straight hits with same card in the pot. AKs v QQ, flop 4-flush but brick out. Another MTT snaps my 88 with a Q on the river vs 2 KQs. Back on the downswing. Goddammit.

Tonight had a game at the house, made back a couple hundy. AA picks up a nice 3-way pot towards the end of the session. AT at the very end snaps Jiddy's KK-wooHOO! Got very lucky though. Moran takes an early beating from his favorite game. Mateen busts out in like 15 minutes, seriously, slow down son for godssakes. His buddy didn't make it too much longer. Colin's QQ gets snapped by Todd's 68s when he rivers a flush. Todd then gets busted by Eli's Wheel on the turn over his flopped 1 pair w/AK. Marty Bacardi joins the game after a long absence from the table. Colin's KK gets cracked when Eli flops quad snowmen and rope-a-dopes Jiddy, who leads pretty hard on the flop and turn, until Eli pushes all-in and busts Jiddy's ill-timed ploy. Felt like I was back in Vegas when once again Colin dared Jiddy to shotgun 4 beers in 5 minutes. After 3, he sprayed beer all over my ceiling when he couldn't keep it all down, like the fountains at Bellagio. After 4 he sprayed my floor, continuing outside. Attaboy, you're good for the entertainment Da Vinci you assclown.

I'll try to post Day Three (my event) from Vegas tomorrow evening-'cause it's Boston @ Oaktown at noon...

Part Deux

(These are the only photos that came out halfway decent as my camera decided to be uncooperative)

Thursday 12N: A few FCPers are playing today in the $5000 NL HE Short-handed event. Pros are EVERYWHERE. It’s tougher to say who I didn’t see than who I did. Annie Duke and Kristy Gazes to Shannon Elizabeth and Jennifer Tilly. Evelyn Ng is Amazonian! Was gonna ask to get a photo with her but my face would be like even with her chest. And not like that’s a bad thing but it might make for a goofy picture. Tables of 6-one had Erik Seidel, Mark Seif, and Scott Fischman; another has Men Nguyen, Chris Ferguson, and Mimi Tran. Hellmuth enters in typically late fashion and is seated next to Chan. Gavin Smith and Griffin. Juanda and Huck Seed. Marcel Luske and his upside-down glasses and Phil Gordon. Watch "The Grinder" make some moves. Say hi to Carlos Mortensen and have a quick chat with Sheiky (who told you about this game Shawn?). Tony G. Seidel. Cunningham. Devilfish passing out cards for his online site. The list goes on and on. Met Jennifer Leigh, aka Jennicide. Theresa got Norm MacDonald's autograph: "Don't Do Crack." Check out Ted Forrest and Mike Sexton at a ring game after they exit the event (got to meet him briefly earlier too!). Fidler, the Negreanu Protege, gets busted early unfortunately. Robin, the brother of Sol, a Protege runner-up, gets sandwiched between Howard and Blair Rodman. He eliminates Rodman; earlier watch him raise Howard and Howard thinks for a few before moving all-in and Robin folds (I find out the next day that later in the day his AA eliminated Howard’s KK-from Howard). David Williams gets into some unfortunate circumstances as I watch him bully w/A8 on a JJ8 flop and J? calls and even rivers the case J (later, Williams is eliminated w/QQ by AQ when an Ace hits the board). Introduce myself to Rich Belsky of CardPlayer magazine, since he gave me a rep job, and he in turn introduces me to Jeff Shulman. Get caught mouth agape staring at Dolly I'm in such awe of the man.

3PM: PL HE event from the day before continues play; Daniel, Matt Matros, and a friend of Daniel’s from Europe are still in the hunt. Get to briefly talk to DN again before the event re-starts. 3 of the 4 FCPers are still in it, Robin having a particularly good-sized stack, are still playing in the short-handed event. Head back to Binion’s, where a few more FCP crew have arrived with their respective others and are playing downstairs, as are even more already.

6PM: $1/2 NL HE @ Binion’s. Live straddle of $2, I raise $30, SB and BB call, flop 762 w/2 clubs, SB checks, BB bets $30, I move over the top for another $130, SB folds, BB calls w/KQ of clubs, rivers a motherfucking King. Looking at it now, he had a lot of outs-any club, and any King or Queen as well. Still, fuck him. Actually, fuck me, because I’m now stuck pretty damn good.

11PM: I’m going to sleep since I’ve been up since Wednesday around noon. And my event starts at noon tomorrow.

Vegas/WSOP Part 1

Wednesday 10PM: Slot machines in the airport-what a town. Theresa and some other FCPers are on a table at Binion’s when I arrive. I walk into a ghetto-ass room, in the old section of the hotel. Whatever, that’s why it’s so cheap. We head over to the Rio; Johnny Chan is walking out as we are walking in. Meet up with Mike from FCP to pick up my gear. Thanks Matt-the button-down is smooth, lemme tell ya, and so is the polo! Enter the WSOP room and head over to the PL HE event going on, where we meet up with another couple from FCP. Freddy Deeb is standing behind us, talking to another fellow (wow, is he tiny). At the tables we see Mike Sexton, Kathy Liebert, and DANIEL!!! He gets up immediately at his first opportunity to come over and greet us. Greg even snuck in a handshake before DN realized what he was doing (see DN's video blog)! Daniel knows me by my screenname at FCP and my avatar (of bouncing breasts) and apparently his mom didn’t necessarily approve of such. Showed him the one-of-a-kind Oker hat. My first impression of Daniel in person is “what a nice guy.” Really. I mean, he is in the middle of a WSOP event but comes over to the rail to talk to us-repeatedly. I watch him for a few minutes when he goes back to his table and he keeps an eye on us, really giving me the feeling that he does genuinely care about his fans. Or he’s just making sure we’re not (real) crazies. You the man, Danny Boy. Glad to see you back at the Rio bruddah. Next stop, the Venetian. Meet up with yet another FCPer, grab some grub and open up a $3/6 Omaha 8/b table. Not my first choice but I go along. Play like a retarded monkey with a cash donation but at least it’s amongst friends. Worth seeing the one “outsider” who dared join us squirm in frustration in response to a lot of my stupid play though. And learn a whole new ballgame with the “Mississippi Straddle,” where the button raises in the dark and is a live straddle and the SB acts first. The rest of the crew calls it a night.

Thursday 3AM: I switch rooms to the newer section. It’s like a whole different hotel on the other side-my new room is a deluxe suite compared to what they first tried to stick me in. Even got a little mini-fridge. Head back downstairs for some HOLD EM. 2 hours of short-handed $4/8 sticks me for a good beating, as I’m constantly run down: turn a flush, beat by the boat on the river; trip 6s, A kicker, beat by J6 when a Jack falls on the river. Or 3 players chop a huge pot with AK, the case K on the board. I am obviously weaker at Omaha Split, and just Limit games in general. Poker room rate ($30/50) for my hotel room at least and a comped breakfast in the café-thanks Benny. No Limit here on out.

8AM: Head to the Rio again for some morning satellite action. Cabs suck out here BTW. 5th in a $125 10-way and 8th in a $175. Guy flops quad Aces in my 1st one (TG it was someone else in the pot and not me!)!!! Too fast of a structure for me-like a Turbo SNG-and a crapshoot at best. I decide to just buy-in directly tomorrow.